Sunday, August 17, 2008

How Well Do You Know Your Mother?

This essay made me think about how much I know about my mother and how much my kids know about me. I've heard stories about my mom's life growing up but I realize I could learn a lot more about who she is now by learning about who she was then. I would tell my kids that among the Duran Duran and Wham posters I had a Paul McCartney picture in my closet (why?) with a "Where's the Beef" sticker attached, Will Ferrell doing anything makes me laugh, I love karaoke and have unrealized dreams of being a superstar and I drive in whichever lane I will be exiting from because I like to be prepared.

1 comment:

Dixie Haas said...

In response to your request, I can say that the posters in my bedroom morphed over time into a huge collage/artwork on one wall. In the way of mothers who are unlike their daughters and vice versa, my mother was most unhappy about the artwork (especially when she decided to remove it to change the space into her sewing room). The collage, at its height, included photos of my political, social, and musical inspirations such as Bettina Aptheker, Dr. King, The Beatles (in their transcendental period), and any or all of my literary forebears. You can readily see why my mother would want my bedroom door to remain closed when family and friends visited.

While I agree Will Ferrell is funny, the things that most make me laugh are largely irreverent (but not intended to be disrespectful) spiritual scenarios, such as what God might have said when hitting on Mary to become the mother of Jesus ("Mare, you know I made your cells, girl.")

While I very much enjoyed Ms. Donahue's essay and U2, I feel she's overstated the validity and veracity of her choice for best band in the world. Everyone knows Eagles are the best band in the world. If U2 remain as consistently brilliant for nearly four decades as the aforementioned gentlemen have, Ms. Donahue can then quibble with my choice.

Knowing me, you know I derive great enjoyment in what author, Larry McMurtry, calls, "the culture of the book." Reading and writing have long been dear to my heart and I'm fortunate to count myself as someone who has a literary lineage through the great teachers who've so generously passed along their expertise and knowledge to me. Before writing, painting and drawing were my chief creative passions and in some ways, still are. I may very well write like a painter.

Just to confound others and to amuse myself, I like combining spiritual metaphors and driving so I usually choose the "middle way" on byways consisting of more than two lanes.

Perhaps something to tell your children are things you may not know about yourself but your mother does. In your first year of life, your red, white, and blue bedroom walls were decorated with Peter Max wallpaper and framed portraits of Chief Joseph, Red Cloud, and Sitting Bull. Tiger's Milk was your favorite drink before sugar overindulgence at the hands of your grandparents and you ate a largely organic diet gleaned from gardens and local growers so you were a sustainably oriented toddler. When you were colicky you responded to Santana's Abraxas, especially the windchimes. If any of these things speak to you now, perhaps you're returning to your roots.

I believe if daughters should know their mothers, mothers should know their daughters. Thank you for the privilege.